Thursday, April 28, 2011
It’s 2011, it’s normal for men to clean up the private parts right? We even have a name for it- MANSCAPE. You need to tidy up the area down there for the off chance your lovely wife wants to participate in some oral pleasure, she doesn’t end up unexpectedly doing a little flossing. So, ok, that’s out of the way….I manscape and I’m not embarrassed to let you know. But here’s a piece of advice- Be aware of where you take care of this activity. The other night I went down in the basement to give myself a haircut…a real one. Things were going as normal, I got out my mirror, plugged in my clippers and started to buzz my head. When I was finished, I figured I would just do the manscaping since the clippers were already out. Normally, I would do this in the bathroom with the door locked, but I was in a hurry so I thought I could do it quickly. So, I take off my shirt, pants, and underwear……but then I remember that my wife broke a glass on the floor the night before and it still hadn’t been cleaned up, so I looked around for the nearest pair of shoes. The only pair around were my work shoes, so I threw them on…naked. I grabbed the clippers and started to trim away. I was almost done when all of a sudden I heard my wife come down the basement stairs. She knew I was down there, but she thought I was only cutting my “real hair”, so she came right down the stairs and into the back area where I was working. I didn’t know what to do, of course she knows I maintain that area, but she has never actually seen me in the moment. So, when she turned the corner there I was--- buck naked… wearing my shiny black dress shoes. I was shocked…I didn’t really know what to do. We have been married for 10 years, I have seen her have 2 kids and she has checked me for hemorrhoids in the past, but this was weird. It wasn’t sexual in any way…..just plain weird!!!! We both stopped, looked at each other glassy eyed and stared…… and it’s cold in the basement in early April. The shock lasted for approximately 5 seconds until she asked me to help her carry a box upstairs…..so I did..still naked with my back shiny shoes. The kids were in bed of course.