Tuesday, August 9, 2011
High School Reunion
It's a well known fact that most guys either don't attend any of their high school reunions or they do so reluctantly at the incessant nagging that comes along with having a wife. Then there are a small percentage of guys who seemingly have been waiting for this night since the last reunion, counting the days until they can meet up with all the "friends" from their class that they have had daily contact with on Facebook. These are the guys who will travel great distances to have a night of reminiscing with members of a class who have long since forgotten who they were or simply don't give a shit about them. I recently attended my wife's 20th and I had a great time but with the amount of drinks my buddy and I had, we could have had a good time getting a ball removed. There were all the people at this event that you would expect: the girl that used to be hot who is now taking up way too much space, the smart girls who have great careers and make you feel completely shitty about your own career, the drunken idiots who are still drunken idiots (these guys are the best) and the people who still live in a world where the most best days of their lives were lived in high school. These are the people I have a major problem with. If the best days of your life was in high school then lets face it, you must be a real douche. Kids in high school are dumb as shit. They think they know everything and that's what makes them unbearable. I know this because for 4 years, actually, we'll call it six because I'm a slow learner, I was one of these people. Do you know how many times I heard my father utter the words "you're gonna regret this later in life"? He must have said that to me 3 times a day for 4 years and he was 100% right. When you run into people like this, you know it immediately because they are 1. Right on time for the event 2. Way happier than everyone else 3. Wearing sneakers with a shirt and tie and most importantly 4. ALONE. Steer clear of these people at all cost because when you run into them, after an awkward hug and a few uncomfortable minutes of small talk, they will ask you for your contact info and then you will never escape. If you are one of these people, please delete this link, stop counting the days to your 25th and fuck off.